as i sat down to read in the small commons area on campus last winter, i struggled to find a place to sit my coffee and newspaper on the table in front of me.
why? because the person across from me had his feet propped up on the table meant to be shared by the four chairs surrounding it.
another person joined the two of us with arms full of books, laptop, etc., and after several seconds of awkwardly waiting for the 1st person to move his feet, he sat down bewildered. he eventually left still looking bewildered..
unfortunately, this is not uncommon behavior at a school that “equips pastors” and other ministers. it shouldn’t be the case, but these are some of the more common breaches of etiquitte and manners that are breached , not just on campus (though some are applicable anywhere).
- men, anytime you are going through a doorway, always look behind you to see if their is a lady or older person that you may hold the door for.
- anyone, if someone holds the door for you, saying “thank you” is the appropriate response.
- if you are strolling down the hallway or sidewalk with friends, it is impolite to not give way to someone walking the opposite direction and force them into the wall or mud because of your “offensive line” (see what i did there??)
- in the hallways and at the top and bottom of stairwells, particularly between classes, recognize that with so many students and so little space, that you may need to move your conversation from standing in the middle of the hallway to against the wall or somewhere else out of the way of the hundreds of people trying to get around you.
- in the classroom, once the professor steps up to the lectern, please stop talking.
- during the lecture… stop talking at a normal volume to your neighbor when you agree/disagree/have another thought about the topic. students are paying a lot of money and spending a lot of time expecting to be able to hear a professor without being distracted or unable to hear the lecture.
- before you ask a question in class, ask yourself “am i wanting to ask this question so everyone will see how much i know. or because i truly need clarification?”
- along those same lines, if you do have a legitimate question, but it is beginning to take up a large amount of classroom time, be considerate of the professor who has a syllabus to get through and the students who are paying to learn the information prepared for them by the professor and ask if the conversation can be continued after class sometime.
(obviously, class discussion is part of the learning experience and the professor can discern if it is beneficial to continue the discussion during class or not)
- propping your feet up on the chair in front of you or on the partition is disrespectful to the professor/lecturer and to the custodial staff who has to clean up after you.
- guys, it is in the campus handbook… no hats in the classroom. if you didn’t know that, now you do. if you did know that and you still do it, then you are not saying much for your integrity.
- ladies – take a look at this link and give your wardrobe a run down. i have seen many ladies on campus whose dress is a model of dignity and class. but unfortunately i have seen many who, intentionally or not, seem oblivious to the fact that their low cut and/or tight fitting tops and their tight and/or low cut pants/skirts that show or outline their undergarments are at best distasteful and at worse a stumbling block.
i started seminary in january of 2004. i am a lot different now than i was when i got here.
needless to say, we all go through changes. we mature. time moves on and for the most part… so do we. one thing anyone learns from living in an environment that includes so many different people from so many different backgrounds and cultures is that people are different. and different is not always bad! people are raised with different values and norms. i am not saying that we lose our personality and give up our freedoms to a bunch of “rules” or even preferences.
but if we are in seminary to be trained as ministers and servants, we might as well practice some door holding and ettiquitte while we are here. who knows… we may just have to use some of that in ministry.
This is a rare blog re-run, it was originally posted by stephen lee cavness titled “open letter.”